THE DIFFERENCE IN SEXUAL ASSAULT BETWEEN MEN/WOMEN, FROM A SEXUALLY ASSAULTED MAN
So my sophomore year of college my school held a free Diplo concert sponsored Victoria Secret (gotta love college), and after the concert me and my roommate Rillz had been drunkenly asking people “Where’s Diplo?”, “What’s a Diplo?”, and various other stupid questions about Diplo. It was a pretty stupid troll attempt, I know.
Anyways I ended up saying something to this mom who was there. I couldn’t tell she was a mom at first until she spoke, in a southern accent, and said “Oh, aren’t you just the cutest little thing?” Right after saying that, she grabbed me and plopped a sloppy wet kiss right on my lips. This caught me off guard, and had me frozen in confusion for a second. The lady’s friend, with a look of disgust, yelled “Oh my god Karen (or whatever her name was) you can’t do that!”
Without saying a word, Rillz and I walked away, and quickly moved on to the next person who we could ask stupid Diplo related questions too.
The only reason I’m bringing this up is because this was technically “sexual assault” in every sense of the word. It didn’t occur to me that I had just been assaulted, because I wasn’t scared, just perplexed. I didn’t develop any traumatic experience from it, and forgot about throughout the course of the night.
Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t cool of her to do that and she was totally in the wrong, as assessed by her friend. It was a total violation of my personal space.
Still, I didn’t feel threatened in any way (besides my masculinity, having been called “The cutest thing you’ve ever seen”), and why should I have been? I knew I could kick her ass if the situation escalated any further that would make me feel uncomfortable. That wouldn’t have been the case if it was the other way around.
That’s why I feel ambivalent towards this #MeToo movement, because even if I did publicly claim that I have been a victim, I would’ve been immediately shot down and denounced as someone who’s “baiting”. But the biggest reason why I don’t claim to be part of the #MeToo movement is because I didn’t feel like a victim, even though I essentially was.
However, that isn’t the case with females. Gender equality aside, it’s an undeniable fact that men are much more biologically stronger. If a man started groping up against a woman, she is pretty much powerless in that situation. All she could really do is give in and “consent”, out of fear of being attacked.
Going about your day, amongst hordes of people could easily fuck you up and fuck you, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone would be on edge. There’s a legitimate fear in that, which I will never understand. All I have to do is make sure I don’t say something stupid enough to the point where a guy would want to beat me up (and I’ve tested that threshold, believe me it’s pretty high).
As a “victim” of sexual assault, I know firsthand that sexual assault goes both ways, and I know forcing yourself upon anyone is no bueno. But I also understand that the terror in that circumstance, and the ensuing trauma, are on different pedestals.
I’m only posting this to indicate that I know the difference. Cause when y’all take over the world (Which you probably will. I’ll admit, from personal experience y’all are much smarter) I don’t want to be on your shit list. I’m not tryna fight over breeding sex dolls, like that planet Gazorpazorp in Rick and Morty.